SURRENDER TO BUBBLES
Much of my life has been fighting against the flow of how life really operates.
Perhaps you can feel some resonance within that statement for yourself. You know how it goes. There is a goal, a relationship, or some agenda you are striving for out there in the future (or even the present) and “tunnel vision” takes over. The kind that has you not only block out any possibilities that may be hovering right there in your peripheral vision, but a type of vision that can take a fight or flight course of action.
A course that may indeed leave you with the goal at the end of the tunnel, but with consequences – leaving you feeling not quite like you thought you would. Perhaps a series of events take over that seem to redirect and take you “off course” with a little or a lot of tossing and turning along the way. That is if surrender is not on board as an operating system.
Recently I have declared – well maybe the wiser soul of me has declared – that what I will practice is a deep surrender to what is unfolding in the present. What I am finding is that there is no right/wrong or good/bad in this realm of surrender, but instead an absolute trust.
In this space possibilities show up that won’t appear if an agenda is in place. An agenda based in personal or community standards constructed by the ego that is. (who just loves to be in control you know!) This spaciousness spills forth an amazing array of actions to choose from and gives you practice in trusting your Sourced inner guidance (or your gut as some people would say) .
Along with this is an immense appreciation for how life really operates. Sometimes it feels like magic. Sometimes it feels like you have a team of guides that are watching out for your well-being and subtly directing you into the flow of life. Sometimes you are just darn grateful that you listened and let go of an agenda!
A beautiful example of this appeared for me last week. By the way, once you make a declaration to surrender a little more to what is unfolding it feels like there is a whole lot more spaciousness and freedom in your life than previously.
A couple of weeks ago I was assisting at a Stillness retreat in Houston, Texas about a 2.5 hour drive for me from Austin. I was staying with a beloved friend there who was also part of the retreat. We thought that we would have a lot of time to commune since I was staying with her, but instead our time together was limited. She had made a request the first day I arrived based on something she had given me for my birthday. We both thought that of course there would be time before I left.
As the time grew shorter on the morning of my arranged departure, based on a client I had scheduled that early afternoon in Austin, we reluctantly finished our breakfast and in-depth conversation. Then the pivotal point came. An opportunity for surrender.
I felt the tension start to build in my body triggering me to move more quickly to put everything in the car and get the heck out of Houston so I could at least have a little time at home before my client arrived. As I felt that tension build within the conversation I was having with myself, I took a breath and listened in to what the space was requesting.
My friends request clearly arose taking me into a deep trust of what was being asked for in that moment. As we carried my things out to the car I said to Nancy, we do have time to blow bubbles before I leave! (you see she had given me one of those long tubes of bubble liquid that you wave in the air to release the bubbles)
With everything in the car we played with the bubbles with the abandon of a child. In fact, the picture that Nancy took of me above had the caption “8-year-old Gaye”. We were both so in the moment to moment of play with each other, and the magic of bubbles, that my departure was put off some more.
When I came to from magical play mode I realized that I needed to get gas before I headed off. Surrender…
The Valero station very close to Nancy’s home was my next destination. Once I arrived I saw a very large truck delivering something to the small store associated with the gas pumps. It was almost completely blocking the path to turn onto the street from the gas pump. I saw that it wouldn’t take me very long to get gas (I have a Prius with a very small tank) and there was no one behind me, so I would back up when my tank was filled.
Jumping in the car after filling the tank, with an agenda in mind – back up and get onto the street – I saw in my rear view mirror a car drive up behind me effectively blocking my way. Throwing my hands up in the air I felt trapped within the time that was ticking away. Then it came….surrender to life unfolding.
I thought I saw a way to go down the driveway (versus over the curb) to get to the street, but it was to be a tight maneuver. I took one stab and then stopped all together. A smiling face then appeared near my driver’s side window and started directing me on how to maneuver the car. Once I was in line with the driveway to scoot narrowly beside the truck, I rolled down my window and gave this helpful stranger a big smile and a thank you.
What happened next were some very pleasurable flirtatious moments with an exceedingly good looking and respectful Native American man who was obviously enjoying the connection and wanted to know if I “lived around here”. After chatting for a few moments he wished me a safe journey home to Austin and we parted ways.
Still in a very pleasant surrendered mode (you know how it is ladies when you are more mature – 67 to be exact – and someone flirts with you so openly) and with a smile on my face I traveled down the freeway on my way home. Time wise I would still get home with about 45 minutes before my client arrived.
Then came another opportunity to surrender. With this came a recognition that everything that had transpired before had been on purpose within the space of letting go of an agenda, addressing requests for connection, and trusting the miraculous way that life unfolds.
About half way home the traffic came to an abrupt standstill and then slowly moved forward at about 5 miles an hour (usually 70mph on this freeway). After a couple of miles of this I saw two police cars completely blocking the freeway with no cars in sight on the other side of their barrier. We were directed to a feeder road which was slow going as well, but not as much. As I glanced to the freeway on my left after about a mile on the feeder road, 100’s of cars started appearing completely stopped on the freeway with engines off.
And then it came. There were police, ambulance and fire trucks surrounding the scene of a very serious traffic accident. Firemen were in the process of cutting someone out of a severely damaged vehicle. Cold chills traveled throughout my body and my breath stopped for a moment. That could have been me.
But it wasn’t. I had surrendered to life unfolding and let go of agendas. This conscious action had possibly kept me from sitting on a freeway for hours while they cleared the scene of the accident….or worse, from me being one of the victims of this accident.
There is so much wisdom in trusting the flow of life, and though I am still gaining competency in the domain of surrender, I see how much more fluid and rich with connection, mystery, magic, creativity, freedom and possibility it is to declare that you will live in this way.
By the way, I arrived 10 minutes prior to my client arriving at my home office….and it was one of the most powerful sessions she has had!
Surrender to the bubbles…..and the good looking Native American (guardian angel in disguise?) that flirts with you!
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