This is my backyard now….
Yes, believe it or not it certainly is and I am so incredibly grateful for this new home of mine. Here are some highlights of just how powerful it can be to trust the unfolding of life, possibilities emerging on which you take action – choosing those that feel in alignment within you….. just like an improvisational dance.
And so it began, with the Prius packed to the hilt with all my personal possessions ready to drive off to California. Actually, it started 4 months prior in the latter part of April when I woke up from a sound sleep with the words Grass Valley/Nevada City hovering in front of me in the air (well, you gotta understand – I am a visual/kinesthetic type of girl!). Over the next 4 months I took action from this invitation including a May 5-day trip to re-explore this area and to see my grandchildren.
I was asked to surrender over and over again during this time and simply step out of the way so that I could see the possibilities that presented themselves. Whenever I exerted “control”, like the timing of the move, I was shown yet another possibility.
One powerful example was when I decided I had to “wait until next year to make this move in order to pay down accumulated debt and be in a “better” financial position”. The sourced message here was to try on the possibility that by moving sooner I would “pay down debt” faster.
As soon as I embodied that possibility (making room for it inside of me) a part time online job that I could do from anywhere presented itself and was secured with my dear friend’s Healthy Child company.
With my car altar, Buddha looking out the back, and Ganesha directly in back of me at the driver’s side removing any obstacles that I might come in contact with I started my drive after easily selling off almost everything I owned lightening the load tremendously.
It was with some sadness that I left Austin, beloved friends, my satellite practice in Houston, wonderful clients, teaching at the University of Texas, those incredible clouds and sunsets, and the abundance of wild flowers in the Spring….but this California girl was returning home to be closer to beloved family and to commune with and live in the natural world.
Did I know where I was going to live when I got to the foothills of the Sierra Nevada mountains? Well that is yet another story of letting go…a dance that asked me to trust the movement that like ecstatic dance created from within itself as various choices presented themselves.
Hundreds of miles to go with landscape such as this were ahead of me. Though a very dear friend had provided me with books on CD to listen to I was drawn to do the entire trip in silence while I was driving.
Through West Texas and it’s very unique flavor of people and landscape; into Albuquerque, New Mexico; Flagstaff, Arizona; the Grand Canyon; Las Vegas, Nevada and then on to my new home in Grass Valley, California (elevation 2,500 feet) opportunities to deeply commune with the land and pay absolute attention to the colors, shapes, changing skies, silence, scents in the air, sounds, plant life, birds, animals (a coyote passed directly in front of my car on a drive from the Grand Canyon) and the sacredness that is our Earth, was placed before me in each moment.
How many times do we give ourselves permission to simply be with the earth and all her changing moods without human created distraction of some sort?
My Airbnb hosts were extraordinary in each stop over. In the one place that I thought I wanted to get through as fast as possible – Las Vegas – I found a couple who immediately felt like dear sacred friends – Anatoly and Sasha. Our conversations were deep and incredibly connected and I left the next morning knowing that I had two new people to add to my growing community.
Words cannot even come close to what I experienced in communion with the Grand Canyon! I had never been and was determined to route this trip so that I could explore even if it was for only a few hours. From the first moment I got there I felt a rush of energy moving through my body and when first viewing the Canyon from the South rim I started crying and did not stop for awhile.
To say my moments spent there were profound is somehow glossing over all that I felt and experienced. This is sacred indigenous land and the immensity strikes one so powerfully that it renders anything but simply being present almost impossible.
When I arrived back in California where I spent the first 54 years of my life it was simply like “coming home” to a familiarity of landscape and people. The welcome that I received in my new home by the creek was the warmest I have ever received from a “landlord” (he was the first one that answered my Craig’s list ad looking for a rental before I left Texas) and though he wasn’t even home to greet me, signs were left everywhere that he
was happy to have me there.
Seriously tired after the long driving journey and all that preceded it before, all of these “welcomes” felt like embrace after embrace. Even when I accidentally walked in on my new neighbors across the hallway from me thinking it was my space, and caught them lounging in their robes and slippers, I was welcomed with laughter!
Now it is 5 weeks since I have arrived and I am often out on my deck overlooking the creek and down by the rushing waters. The sound lulls me into a place of stillness that is always there to rest within, and deep gratitude for this life I have been given. In the last couple of weeks I have started connecting with community and am now part of the Briar Patch Co-op, Dance Tribe Nevada City, and The Center for the Arts in my small town of Grass Valley.
Of the 5 weekends I have been here 3 of those have been spent with grandchildren, sons and bay area friends “down the hill” from where I live. What joy! (oh and the gorilla is simply part of my family as well!)
Now it may seem that the entire last 6 months of my life were simply “charmed”, but that is not what I call it. There is a point in time when you start absolutely trusting what life is bringing you. Embedded in those precious moments are a multitude of spacious possibilities.
This way of living is what I call an “ego-bypass” (I send mine to the Bahamas on a regular basis!) where action is taken from what the body is so wisely informing. In other words, it is an “inside job” dear ones.
No amount of affirmations or intentions, spiritual practices or bending over backwards will take the place of this unfailing trust that comes from a deeply embodied spaciousness inside – a deep listening to what the body is informing you and the messages from Source/God/All that is – whatever you want to call these gifts of direction.
This does not mean that there won’t be challenges and seriously difficult passages along the way. That is a part of life. With a re-injured low back a day before leaving on my long journey cross country I was aware that it was simply a part of what I was to accept, take special care of, and listen to as I made my way. The injury and associated pain brought a more mindful journey than might otherwise have been present.
I am acutely aware that there is an unfolding that is yet to come bringing with it more opportunities for connection, actions based on embodied trust, challenges to sort through, and disconnecting from agendas and expectations…. to simply drop the struggle and deeply appreciate the moments I am given.
This is an invitation to each of you to be in contact with me as you feel so moved….and certainly if you will be in the Northern California area to let me know.
Within Absolute Love,
P.S. Conscious Embodied Relocation guidance available.
*Being Called *Awareness of Internal Conversations
*Sensing Into Location *Timing *Creating Connections *The Nitty Gritty Details *Listening to the Body *Trusting the Unfolding *Taking Effective Action *Settling In *Creating Community….and more!